1.06.2009

First Post in 09

Happy New Year everyone! I have been on a somewhat of a hiatus due to the holidays and my Dru-induced depression. I hate to be a debbie-downer, but the situation between the two of us caused me to be incredibly sad. I have to say it was the worst Christmas that I can remember. I'm not asking for pity, but I like to use this blog to express things I wouldn't normally say out loud. So I never heard from Dru after the email, and don't expect to. I've said it before, and you are probably tired of hearing about this, but I JUST DON'T GET WHY!? I honestly didn't think he was that type of person. But whatever, I am putting it behind me and moving on (ha...easier said than done). I won't bother y'all with my Dru issues anymore because it is the same over and over again (that is a goal - not a promise).

It is a new year, and I probably should have made some resolutions, but I was too busy sitting on the couch crying for the past two weeks. But last night I couldn't sleep and decided I would spend my time trying to figure out how I was going to make myself a better person this year. I want to get motivated to find a job (since May is getting here a LOT faster than I suspected), I need to find a passion or a hobby (so I don't rely on a man to make me happy), and I'm swearing off bad relationship habits. My biggest relationship habit that will take some work is communication. I've learned my lesson there!

These are more long-term goals than resolutions but I guess that makes them more important. What were your resolutions?

PS - Sorry if my posts lack spunk...I'm honestly not completely on the happy side yet. Bare with me though, I'm getting there slowly but surely.

6 comments:

Arielle said...

As someone who spent the entire week between Christmas and New Years crying over a boy, I so feel your pain. I hope you feel better soon!! Boys are dumb.

kk said...

Hang in there!

2009 promised to be a better year...so much for you to look forward to!

Tasha said...

Sorry about things with Dru. :-( I think you have a positive outlook on the coming year with your goals for finding a job and finding an activity to keep you busy. Staying busy was always the best way for me to get over a guy. Have a great 2009!

ÄsK AliCë said...

Boys are idiots - seriously what's with this guy? Just disappears. Ugh.

Anyway, I think as long as you try to make things better for the next time that's all you can do. Even if it wasn't your fault in any way, shape or form!

Dana said...

don't ever apologize for talking about your feelings and your thoughts on your blog!! this is what we are here for... talk about Dru and your feelings all you want!!

Keep your head up.. You'll be ok.. and find something more deserving that treats you better!

Anonymous said...

Oh sweetheart. I'm sorry. The hardest relationships to end are the ones that don't have a definitive close. The ones where your heart is breaking, simply because you don't understand what could have gone wrong.

I'm here if you need anything.

Oxoxo