Blogger Advice?

Hi everyone! I hope all is well in the blog-world. I really don't like getting used to blogging only a couple of times a week. But it is what it is, right? There haven't been many developments in my real life this week. A few with Dru though...

Last week he texted me to see when I would want to come to his hometown for a visit! I was totally excited, but not looking forward to the 9 hour drive or $400 plane ticket. I told him this, and I'm almost 100% positive he will be getting me a plane ticket! WTF!? Gary, the ex, hardly even paid when we went on dates. I have never had anyone pay for my things and now THIS! I'm so overwhelmed that I don't even know if I can accept such a thing.

I finally got to talk on the phone with Dru for quite a while last night and that was fun. I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm stupid though - like a dumb blonde. This is mostly due to the fact that I had no idea what I was doing in Columbia, and probably came off as an idiot. I realize that I have my shining blonde moments, but I happen to have a 3.8 GPA and consider myself pretty smart. I told Dru that I work in the investment banking field but was studying marketing. He got a kick out of this and told me they probably hired me because of my looks! I was actually quite offended and tried to defend myself, but his phone was acting weird and I don't think I properly got the point across.

Anyways, we had discussed me coming to visit this weekend, but there is a big game the next weekend that he thinks will be more fun. People, if this actually does happen, I'm going to be a mess in the days before. I am already nervous, and it's not even final that I'm going. I'm nervous about meeting his friends, spending so much time with him and just being out of my element. And the thing is: I don't really even know him! The two times we have hung out we have been drunk for the most part. I know he is a safe, respectable guy through other people (long story), so I'm not worried about that, but it's just so not like me to jet off to hang out with some dude I hardly know!

These days I'm all about 'living on the edge', as corny as it sounds. But I want to live my young life to the fullest and not have regrets. That is why, if he offers a plane ticket, I will accept. I am pulling myself out of my comfort zone and into new situations to force personal growth. If things don't go great, I will come home and get on with my life. If things go great, who knows, I might just be looking for a job further south come May. Haha!

As for Ed, he is coming the last weekend of September and I have agreed to let him stay at our place. And I also agreed to take him down to Wilmington (2 hour drive) for his flight home. Here is the hard part: I'm not really that interested in him anymore. I have a terrible problem of dropping anything, not thinking of who I might hurt in the process, for the next best thing.

I'm hoping that Ed has realized that things aren't going to go any further mainly due to the long distance between us. Also, we never really discussed what happened with us, so I don't feel like there is any formal commitment. So, technically, I'm out of the woods. But emotionally, I don't know where he is at.

I'm not really looking forward to him staying at our place anymore, I actually really don't want him there, but I don't think I can un-invite him. His visit might shape up to be the most awkward of all time. I'm going to wait on telling Ed anything definite after I see what happens with Dru.

Here is my ideal situation:

Dru flies me down to his hometown, we have a great time. Maybe even make plans for another visit.
When Ed comes, I have a legit reason to ask him to stay elsewhere. Explaining to him about Dru, and then everything is out in the open.

With my luck though, none of that will come true. If anyone has comments/suggestions I would love to hear them!


kk said...

Hmm...quite a pickle.

My advice? If you're not interested in Ed, I would either:

1. tell him beforehand that you'd love for him to visit and stay with you (and repay the favor!), but that it would be strictly platonic. I know this is a tough conversation, but if you don't have it, it could lead to very uncomfortable moments

2. have him stay somewhere else. that way, there's no mixed messages on his side at all.

Bottom line, I think you need to tell him, especially if he's coming here to visit you and thinks that you might be interested. In the long run, it will make you feel better (and not like you're doing something shady to Dru).

that's my two cents!

Muffy Willowbrook said...

Yowza - that's a toughie.

Here's what I think ~~

Dru? Yes, absolutely go. He's offering, you're excited and gracious and who knows? It could be a alot of fun. Nothing has to happen you don't want to happen.

Ed? I agree with KK. Explain that it should be platonic. There's nothing wrong with that. For whatever reason, you're choosing to keep it at that level for the weekend. If it's awkward - well, then you're already in the clear. If it goes better than you think - you can always change your mind.

meh - but what do I know?! Good luck!

Dana said...

As fas as Dru you should go.... I think it'd be a great thing!!

AS far as ed - just be honest and up front so you cover all of your bases!!